porn, curry and the seaside

I just took my lunchbreak on the beach in the storm and it was outstanding. The pier is shut and the seafront is trashed. There’s bits of plank and rubbish everywhere, with the tidal line of gunk right up by the wall, so the sea has swamped the whole beach at points, way further up than I’ve ever seen. Some kids walked out along the jutting stone cob which has the doughnut statue on it. Then they got utterly sploshed by massive waves, knocked to the ground and left crawling and running away on the ground. I went down to beach level and hung out in what they call the ‘artists quarter’, partially sheltered from the wind and rain but with a worm’s-eye-view of the sea. Magic.

Unfortunately I had some interviews scheduled but my phone was dead – normally it works fine on the seafront, so I guess the storm killed the signal. Now I’m playing interview catch-up.

I’ve been smelling of Indian spices in a disconcerting way. To celebrate my in-laws’ wedding anniversary, we went for a lush meal at Tamarind in Mayfair, which is one of the poshest Asian restaurants I’ve ever been to. The food was delicious and we had a lot of fun. The only thing is, they don’t have a specificially vegetarian main. I’m sure they’ll do all the mains meat-free if you ask, like any place worth its salt, but for some reason I didn’t have the nous to ask, so instead of picking a main, I went for two different side dishes. I had sag paneer and something with new potatoes.

Now I’m guessing here, but I reckon they delicately flavour the main dishes to seal their reputation for subtlety and complexity of flavour, but then, erm, ‘robustly’ flavour the side dishes, so if you eat a main and a side you get a perfect balance of strength and subtlety. Yup, what I’m trying to say is, these two side dishes kicked my arse and I’ve smelled of cumin and turmeric for two days.

Not complaining. The only negative thing was, their lassis are definitely not as good as Kastoori in Tooting, who do the best sweet lassi in London.

The other odd thing I did over this weekend was watched pornography for the first time ever. The local magazine I write for occasionally, Brighton Source, have a regular feature where people do something new, that they haven’t tried before. They aim to go outside comfort zones. The editor James has had colonic irrigation and broken bones snowboarding, plus he’s getting a tattoo in the name of journalism in the near future. Not wanting to let the side down, porn was an obvious choice. Having never seen any before, I’ve now ploughed through a whole range of filthy nonsense in one afternoon. Won’t be doing that again in a hurry! Obviously I’ve got lots to say about it now but I’ll save conclusions for the article.

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2 responses to “porn, curry and the seaside

  1. We, of course, only have your word for the fact you have lead a porn free existence up until now. Personally, I would like to know how in Christ’s pyjamas have you managed to get to whatever age you are without ever having seen any. You must have really gone out of your way. I have been subjected to some true grot by simply being at someone else’s house, let alone my own adventures through that wilderness in the days of singledom.

    Or was it all a big rouse – secretly you’re a fanatical collector and for fear of ending up doing something you’d never like for the article, you chose something you love, because who would know, eh?

    They approached me to do an article too…i am going to write about how i have never eaten cake, and will be involved in a 24 hour orgy of flour based goods and cream.

    hahahahaha..sorry…couldn’t resist

  2. The obedient soul that I am, I followed Evan’s instructions to tour your blog:) Am jealous… Colin Firth…mmmm. Anyways, out of interest, did you include porn by female directors in your ‘research’? I recommend Anna Span;) She’s from Kent you know?!

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